Running, Day 1

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 330.6

W: 155
M: 40-35-41

I've decided to start running. Not trying to run, not run/walking, not training to run. All of those things remind me that I'm not doing what I want to do, and they let me off the hook. If I'm not actually running, then it doesn't matter because I'm not working toward my running goal anyway. Or at least that is what I think my brain "feels." So, from now on, I am running four times a week and walking/hiking other days. Today, I ran my two miles at what ends up being 15 min/mile pace.

Good for me! I would like to be at 12 min/mile pace, but I will get there. Also, I need to scope out a longer place to run, because the program I'm using (one of the one's from Runner's World) called for 5 rounds of 2 min running, 4 min walking but I could only do 4 rounds on my usual route (after walking 5 minutes to warm up a bit). I know how I could extend it to 3 miles simply, but there is a giant hill that I am avoiding. Usually, I feel wasteful if I drive somewhere to exercise (or do anything else fun), but I've decided that I need to get over that. Either buy a bus pass at the grocery store and ride the bus or just get in the car and drive. Staying at home has a horrible effect on my mood, being such an extreme extrovert.

In other news--I passed the bar! It is so hard for me to believe, but I have an official-looking letter saying so! I am kind of amazed at the difference it has made in what I think is now possible (um, pretty much anything! Ha.), and am gearing up for the major job search.

And, randomly--no freaking wonder my clothes have stopped fitting! My waist is about 3 inches bigger than it was at the beginning of the summer! I think today might just be a wacky aberration of some sort, though, since the last time I measured I was four (4!) pounds heavier and an inch smaller. Weirdness. I am glad that I am losing the eat-my-way-to-passing-the-bar pounds. I am going to try to hold off on buying new career clothes for a couple more weeks, to let my body readjust to less stress/better habits.

Motivation

Or, more accurately, lack of motivation.

I've been trying to cook dinner for us every night. It works out ok, and it does save us money from eating out at restaurants. Lunch is almost always leftovers. It's not like I'm doing a whole lot with the rest of my day right now, anyway, so I might as well make sure we are well fed.

Sometimes, though, even if I haven't done anything productive all day long, I don't want to cook. I just want to get out of the house, and not have to do any work. Like last night. I called Dr. MM about 7pm, asking him when he was coming home and if he wanted what I was going to cook. Hoping he would say he wanted to go out, of course. No such luck. I reluctantly agreed to cook what I had already offered to cook, and started working on it.

It was a pretty good dinner! Three veggies and homemade buttermilk biscuits. It took less than an hour to make, and I felt good about making something that we both enjoyed. Also, it was much less expensive than if we had gone out to eat--I would estimate it cost about $7 dollars for us both to eat that (it's hard to estimate how much an 1/8 of a teaspoon of baking soda costs, but I'm guessing not very much). It was probably healthier than restaurant food, even with the biscuits, too.

Anyway, I need a workout partner like Dr. MM. Someone who makes me follow my own best ideas, even when I don't want to. I know that I feel good after I exercise, and I know that it is good for me. I know that I have goals that I can't reach without putting in the daily work. And yet, I still can't get myself out the door in the morning. Sigh.

Another week.

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 332.6

I took a break for the weekend, and it made it hard to stay on track. Oh well, at least today I got up and went. It looks like another beautiful day out there! I will have to think up something good to do today.

Yay!

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 334.6

Another good day! It looks like rain here, which we need a great deal. I finally downloaded some podcasts to take on my walk with me, and I was a little apprehensive about venturing out in the cloudy-ness with my mp3 player. Of course, it didn't rain on me at all, and I'm glad I didn't wimp out.

I still have to tweak my podcasts a bit--I needed about 5 more minutes worth. (I'm downloading interesting sounding ones from npr.) Also, I had to fiddle too much with my player--I almost never use it as the player, but almost exclusively as a jump drive, so I don't know all its features still. It's only four years old! ha. That's ok, I'm glad I'm using it now.

Thursday.

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 336.35

I ran probably a half mile of this, and I feel great! I'm so glad that I started working on this again.

Woohoo!

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 338.35

I made myself walk this morning, and it felt pretty good. I'm glad that I'm getting back on track. While I'm job searching, I know that I will be stressed out at least part of the time, but I also know that it doesn't do any good (and a lot of harm) to let myself out of my routines. So I'm going to try to do them, no matter what. Which means that first thing in the morning (no matter what time), I put on my walking clothes and get out there. Maybe soon I can say they are walking/running clothes!

Also, on Monday, I weighed 157.

Back to Trying

W: 159
M: 41-34-41

One thing that I haven't yet learned is that during times of stress, it does not help to lose all your routines. Eating crap, not moving, and letting the house fall in around your ears doesn't make you feel better or more in control. Surprising, right? Well, I'll just have to work on that from here on out.

Today, the air quality is not supposed to be good in the morning, so I will exercise this evening instead of now. Also, I will have to start making us healthy lunches and dinners. Breakfast is usually pretty healthy for me, and Dr. MM doesn't eat breakfast unless it's brunch or midnight.

BMR: 343.5
FMR: 340.35